A Time for Heroes…

By JERRY GRIT

To take a break from the unrelenting tour of death and loss in “Hades,” we will (Bloom-like) distract ourselves with an administrative matter.

Simply, we need heroes. We need heroes to take on the remaining 7 chapters that have yet to be claimed in our history-making social media-enhanced reading of Ulysses.  You could put it on your resume!

The hero that I am, I will step up and take a few. But I can’t be the only one. (And it would be plain wrong for a dude to run “Penelope”…but I’ll do it. I’ll impose my phallocentric bias on Molly Bloom’s chapter-long streaming conscious. I don’t care. I don’t want to hear any bitching.)  

Here’s where we’re at*…

I changed the color scheme, so that should help.

Ben Vore and I have already been inducted into the Hall of Fame for having done 2 chapters already. Don’t you want this honor? 

If you’re unsure which one to take, let me touch on the interests/skills/dispositions that might be appropriate for the remaining chapters:

• Aeolus: Marketing, Journalism, Advertising
• Laestrygonians: Food, Feelings of Inadequacy 
• Scylla and Charybdis: Shakespeare, Socrates
• Wandering Rocks: Associative Logic, Pornography
• Nausicaä: Sentimental/Romantic Art & Literature, Masturbation
• Ithaca: Homemaking/Entertaining, Disappointment
• Penelope: Crazy Ladies

If any of these aspects correspond with anything in your disposition, anything that will enable you to speak to these issues, then let’s do this thing!

If you’re still unsure, consider the testimonials from those heroes who have already conquered a chapter:

I am a much better person now.  Thank you for saving my life.  –Ben Vore

It was the final missing piece in the incomplete puzzle of my life. –Erin Vore

When I finished Calypso, like Leeroy at the end of “The Last Dragon”, I achieved The Glow! I’m still glowing and catching bullets with my teeth! Thank you, James Joyce! —Lizaanne

Be a master, take a chapter!

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*Please note: I have since rescinded breaking up the longer chapters. That strategy was, apparently, DOA.