The Tweets So Far: Pages 1-219

With Bloomsday merely a week away, and with it, the majestic Reblooming of Wandering Rocks, I’ve collected all 219 one-tweet summaries of each page of Ulysses. (Which, henceforward will be conveniently available via a tab header.)

Much love to VOREBLOG, LIZAANNE, BRENDAN, and KATIE, who generously contributed their reductive powers to this dubious effort!

“Telemachus” (Tweets by JERRY GRIT)
P1. Now here we go. Starts with a big “S” in “stately” and then “plump” and that’s all for page 1! Easy.
P2. Buck, Stephen’s roommate in Tower, does mock Eucharist while shaving on roof. A comedian. Calls Stephen up, mocks his seriousness.
P4. Stephen complains about 3rd roommate Haines (eccentric rich Brit), worried about living with a dude with night terrors and a gun.
P5. D’oh! Buck has the horseface! Buck guilts Stephen about his mom’s death & his refusal to pray beside her. She haunts him in dreams.
P6. Stephen wears only black b/c in mourning. Buck holds up a cracked mirror, repeats rumors of Steve’s insanity. Stephen quotes Hamlet.
Will use abbreviations from now on SD=Stephen Dedalus; BM=Buck Mulligan (ha!); UA=Ulysses Annotated.
P7. BM senses that SD is fed up with BM’s bs. BM asks for SD’s trust. Also asks SD to try to borrow money off Haines. Brit-bashing ensues.
P8. SD tells BM that he overheard BM call his mom beastly dead after her funeral. Embarrassed BM plays off, espouses irreverent lifeview.
P9. SD says he was offended, BM tells him not 2 b. Haines calls up 4 breakfast. BM leaves singing. SD alone recalls singing same song 2 mom.
P10. SD broods on mom. Recalls dreaming of hr ghost. SD begs mom 2 leave hm b. BM yells breakfast ready & Haines is sorry for night terrors.
P11. SD dont want Brit’s money, says he’s getting paid. BM says theyll get drunk. SD thinks about bringing BM’s bowl down. Doesnt wanna serve.
P12. 3 towermates sit at table 4 breakfast. BM wants milk. Milkmaid is sighted coming up. BM makes strong tea, refers 2 SD’s stay in Paris.
P13. Irish folklore inside jokes. Old milkmaid comes in. BM makes fun of her reverence. SD recalls Athena’s milkmaid disguise, Odyssey I-II.
P14. BM patronizes milkmaid. SD’s sympathetic to her but resents her submissiveness. Haines (Brit) speaks Gaelic, but maid doesnt understand.
P15. Haines guilts BM 2 pay milkmaid. BM underpays. Maid leaves. BM begs SD 2 bring money 4 drinks. BM 2 swim with Haines. SD doesn’t bathe.
P16. SD quips agn. Haines wants 2 collect SD’s quips. BM tries 2 get SD 2 ask Haines 4 $. SD refuses. BM resigned, says SD needs 2 play them.
P17. All get dressed 2 leave, SD takes cane & tower’s only key. All 3 walk together. Some tower talk. Haines asks 4 SD’s Hamlet theory.
P18. BM makes fun of theory, SD lets him. Haines says tower recalls Elsinore, one-ups w/another theory. SD feels odd as the only 1 in black.
P19. BM sings his own song about a joking Jesus, dances away. Haines laughs but says 2 SD he shouldn’t. Asks if SD a believer, SD rebuffs.
P20. Haines criticizes personal god idea. SD says SD’s misunderstood. SD knows they want 2 take the key. SD says SDs servant 2 church&England.
P21. SD’s esoteric thoughts about Church heresies, links thm 2 BM. Haines’ an antisemite. They watch boats. Mention Milly Bloom’s dirty? pic.
P22. BM gets ready 2 swim w/another dude already in sea. Old dude jumps out of sea. Redheads are horny liars. BM says he’s Adam, asks 4 key.

“Nestor” (Tweets by VOREBLOG)
P23. SD gives BM key & money. BM extols theft & swims. Haines says theyll meet later. SD leaves knowing he’s been screwed & can’t come back.
P24. SD teaches remedial History. One student thinks Pyrrhus was a pier. Classmates chortle.
P25. SD perplexes class with “a disappointed bridge.” Indulges in reverie about Aristotle, gets swarthy kid named Talbot to read Milton.
P26. More Aristotle: “Thought is the thought of thought.” Class winds down and asks for a riddle. SD tells a terrible one.
P27. punchline: “The fox burying his grandmother under a hollybush.” Wah-wahhh. SD misses his mom. Ugly kid fails math but mom loves him.
P28. Torturous math problem. Makes SD think about Hamlet again. Ugly kid just wants to go outside and play hockey.
P29. Enter Deasy. He’s our Nestor: Blowhard, also pompous, self-righteous and misogynist. Now he’s the teacher and SD is the student.
P30. Deasy pays SD, says “Money is power,” takes Shakespeare out of context. Deasy paid his way — the pride of the English!
p31. Greasy Deasy laughs at SD’s debts, calls him a fenian, then lectures him on The Potato Famine. This guy’s a royal prick.
p32. Deasy asks SD to deliver a letter to the papers. He types, SD reminisces about the racetrack and playing hockey (”the joust of life”).
p33. Deasy’s letter is about … foot and mouth disease? Cue anti-Semitic bluster!
p34. Deasy really hates the Jews. SD wants to awake from the nightmare of history, hears God in “a shout in the street.”
p35. Deasy to SD: You’re not a born teacher. SD to Deasy: “A learner rather.” SD rustles the sheets, really wants this conversation to end.
p36. Deasy has to get in one last anti-Semitic joke. It’s bad. He’s a sad, phlegmy blowhard. SD says nothing; at last he’s free of him.

“Proteus” (Tweets by JERRY GRIT)
P37. SD walking on strand, attempts 2 reach essence of reality beyond protean sight&sound. A lonely egghead. Sees nurse who delivered him.
P38. SD thinks: umbilical as phone line 2 Eve; the inconsequence of his parents. Remembers: Deasy’s letter; 12:30 meet @bar; visit w/aunt.
P39: SD imagines dad mocking aunt’s family. Recalls past visit. Uncle Rich a bedridden opera-loving drunk, son Walt studders. SD’s ashamed.
P40. SD still lost in thought, mocks own rebelliousness, earnestness & ambition. Recalls own perverted prayers 2 see naked ladies.
P41. SD lost in thought along polluted bay, realizes passed aunt’s house, bird associates. Recalls meeting son of Kevin Egan, expat in Paris.
P42. SD recalls living in & coming back from Paris; the unpunctuated telegram about dying mom; Egan as Fenian hero compared 2 his wimp son.
P43. SD recalls being sought out by Egan in Paris; Egan tells Irish indep mvmt war stories & asks SD 2 tell son in Ireland that he’s ok.
P44. SD thinks Ireland forgot Egan. Looks up @ tower, knows he won’t be going back. Sits on rock, looks @ bloated dog body floating in bay.
P45. SD scared by a dog running @ him. Mocks own cowardice, recalls BM’s bravery in saving drowning man. Links self 2 Irish history of fakes.
P46. SD recalls man drowned 9 days before & mom’s death. Sees dog’s owners. Dog barks @ cocklepickers, sniffs bloated dog, pees on rock.
P47. SD recalls last night’s dream of being led by a melon-seller 2 see someone. Sees gypsy c-pickers leave, has dirty thoughts about lady.
P48. SD inspired w/poetic lines, writes on paper from Deasy letter. Looks @ shadow, tries 2 reach the ideal again, recalls girl from monday.
P49. Thinking about girl, SD maybe masturbates. Borrowed boots makes SD recall wearing girls shoes in Paris. SD pees on rocks. Tide comes in
P50. SD thinks again of drowned man’s corpse, Lycidas. Thirsty, rises 2 go 2 meetup w/BM @ bar The Ship. Has bad teeth. Realizes hanky lost.
P51. SD picks nose. Doesn’t care who sees. But worried he’s being watched. Looks out 2 ocean, sees ship w/3 masts, look like 3 crucifixes.

“Calypso” (Tweets by LIZAANNE)
54-Big M
55-Leopold Bloom is introduced by his love of organ meats, how he makes b-fast, & talks to the cat–he anthropomorphizes as pretty but cruel
56-LB watches cat drink; decides on kidney for; checks on wife- she mumbles; considers loose bed springs; puts on hat w/ hidden paper
57-LB leaves key behind so won’t have to disturb wife, wanders down street in good mood; daydreams about exotic East– knows is just fantasy
58-LB greets shopkeeper after considering property values-wonders how he made his money; passes by school– hears lessons; arrives @ butcher
59-LB oogles meat & servant girl in shop; reads ads from cut sheets-thinks of cattlemarket; places order, wants to hurry so can follow girl
60-LB buys sausage, avoiding eye contact w/ butcher; saunters back towards home, reading posters cut sheets adverting far-away farms; leads 2 daydream
61-recalls estranged friends; cloud brings dark thoughts of barren land & people; thinks of home & Molly 2 cheer up; @ home finds mail on mat
62-LB delivers postcard & letter 2 Molly in bed; moves dirty clothes; makes tea; cooks kidney; scans letter from daughter w/ fond memory
63-LB takes b-fast tray 2 Molly, sees she has opened letter; LB lavishly describes her body; letter is from her manager Boylan about concert
64-M asks L 2 define “metempsychosis” from her smutty book; he tries; he recalls day they met & how much he hates circuses; M wants new book
65-still explaining migration of souls; puts book in pocket; kidney burns; LB rescues it & eats alone in kitchen; thinks of daughter’s note
66-Milly’s letter:dad’s girl having 1st adventure; LB thinks of her birth & little boy who died @ birth; LB=fond but not overprotective dad
67-LB recalls Milly’s adolescence; regrets that he can’t keep her innocent & connects to “seaside girls”; LB picks what 2 read in outhouse
68-LB considers planting a garden; wonders about where he left his hat & if he’ll have time for a bath; uses “jakes” w/ door open; reads
69-”titbit” parallels to LB’s toilet use; wishes were writer; recalls scribing conversations w/ Molly; remembers morning after met Boylan
70-LB converts story to toilet paper; inspects suit & wonders what time is funeral; hears churchbells & ends w/ “Poor Dignam!”

“The Lotus Eaters” (Tweets by VOREBLOG)
71. LB takes circuitous route to post office. Distracted by copy of tea ad. Imagines the far east, land of “big lazy leaves,” idleness.
72. LB tries to recall high school physics before sending his letter & receiving one, addressed to “Henry Flower.” Bloom’s pseudonym.
73. LB about to read letter when M’Coy interrupts him. LB not good at small talk. Spots a woman getting into her cab, starts fantasizing.
74. LB completely tunes out M’Coy, hopes for a glimpse of leg. Blocked by tram. Paradise and the peri: so near to paradise, but not quite.
75. LB now distracted by potted meat ad. Husbands talk about wives, both singers. M’Coy asks LB 2 write his name in funeral register.
76. LB disparages M’Coy: A homosexual? Leah is playing tonight, causes Bloom to reflect on dad’s death (suicide).
77. LB bonds w/castrated horses. (Everyone is impotent.) Finds flower pinned to Martha’s letter. Martha’s a bad speller
78. Martha’s letter: “You’re a naughty boy!” Wants 2 meet Bloom & know what perfume Molly uses. LB thinks of manflower, cactus, nightstalk.
79. LB thinks of Mary & Martha. Tears up letter & scatters the shreds. The word ‘bungholes’ also appears on this page.
80. LB enters church, thinks of missionaries in China. The Good News=opium? Wants 2 sit next 2 a woman. Priest administers the sacrament.
81. LB misreads I.N.R.I. & I.H.S. Thinks of Molly’s letter, then ‘crawthumper’ Carey. Wonders: Why not Guinness for the chalice?
82. Choir loft makes LB think of Molly in Stabat Mater, “old sacred music,” eunuchs. Worship through eyes of an outsider: strange routines.
83. Confession: Not for everyone, but effective. LB ducks out before the offering, discreetly buttoning as he goes.
84. LB stops @ chemist’s 2 order Molly’s lotion but recipe (and key) are in his other pants. Asks chemist 2 check his files.
85. LB places order & buys soap. Unwittingly gives winning tip on horse race [Throwaway] to Bantam Lyons.
86. LB walks toward public baths, greets Hornblower, ponders cricket, anticipates lying naked in bath. Penis = ‘languid floating flower.’

“Hades” (Tweets by KATIE)
87. We meet Martin Cunningham, Mr. Power, Simon Dedalus (in person) getting into the carriage in front of Dignam’s with LB in last.
88.On their way thru town to funeral.LB points out Stephen to Simon.Simon asks if BM is w/him. Rants about how much BM sux.LB thinks of Rudy
89. LB reflects on Milly growing. Men express disdain for crumbs in carriage. They get stopped at the grand canal.
90. LB thinks of his father’s death and the dog, Athos, he inherited. Men chat about weather, mock a few mutual acquaintances, read obit
91. LB tries to remember what he did with letter,passes Blazes Boylen just as he’s thinking of him, examines nails and tries to ignore him
92. LB talks of Molly’s tour w/the finest musicians, dwells on Power calling her Madame, thinks of her then of Powers alleged mistress
93:Men spot Dodd a jewish money lender all have been to but LB. LB tries to tell funny story about Dodd & his son but MC keeps interupting
94. LB starts to tell joke about Dodd’s son almost drowning, MC steps all over it. finishes story. much laughter
95. men discuss sudden death of PD. LB thinks it’s best to go quickly. Other men seem to disagree. They see a child’s coffin.
96. Men remark on child’s coffin. JP says suicide is worst death.MC says to reserve judgement knows how LB’s father died.LB appreciates that
97. It’s finally blatantly stated thru Lbs thoughts that his father died of suicide. They pass by cattle. Carriage is stopped again.
98. LB ponders a new tramline that could carrya coffin.They remember a coffin falling out of a carriage before. LB thinks of PD falling out
99. LB details the scenery, crossing over canal, the man on the turfbarge, the stonecutter’s yard, a tramp on the side of the road…
100. They pass by a home where a murder took place, get to cemetery, notice how few carriages are there
101. men see Dignam’s family at cemetery. Coffin is carried. MC scolds JP about talk of suicide. JP didn’t know about LB’s father
102. Men discuss the Dignam family.LB ponders widowhood. Small talk with Ned Lambert. Discuss money collection for the family.
103. LB sees PD’s son, wonders if he was there when PD died. LB at back of church. LB’s mind wanders during requiem mass all the way to gas
104. LB’s mind continues to wander, ponders the service, altar boys. The mass ends.
105. Simon sees his wife’s grave, weeps. Catholic men comfort him that she;s in heaven. Kernan and LB chat, both do not practice Catholicism
106. JH Menton inquires as to who LB is. He remembers Molly, wonders aloud why she would be w/LB.
107. Men run into caretaker there, He tells a funny story about two drunks looking for their friend’s grave.10:36 PM Jul 28th from web
108. LB thinks about how the caretaker got a wife to live in the cemetery, raised a family there & how the bodies will decompose over time
109. LB still wondering about decaying bodies, the cemetery and the idea of burials. PD’s coffin is placed in the grave.
110. LB thinks about the idea of coffins, notices the mystery “man in the macintosh” is the 13th one there
111. LB thinks of his plot, how terrible it would be if PD was alive thru this. Burying the coffin. Hynes takes names doesn’t know LBs 1st
112. Hynes & LB don’t know who MinM is or how he’s vanished so quickly. They finish burying coffin. Dignam fam places wreaths on it
113. walking to Parnell’s grave. LB thinks $ on burial better spent on the living. Thinks of all the dead, once like him.
114. LB thinks:how could we remember everyone who’s died anyway?cheese=milk corpse, cremation>burial,eager to get outta cemetery
115. MC comes w/JHM. LB recognizes,says it was hate @1stsight,pts out JHM’s hat is crushed,JHM pauses,MC pts it out 2,only then does he fix

“Aeolus” (Tweets by BRENDAN)
116. Trams on Sackville Street near General Post Office. Language reverses like traffic. Dullthudding. LB at Freeman’s Journal.
117. Editor arrives, steered by Umbrella. Door whispers. WB’s face likened to Jesus’. Or a tenor’s. LB wants to place Keyes’ ad in FJ.
118. Hynes here with account of PD’s funeral. Machines rule the world. LB seeks Nannetti: politician and printer, Italian and Irish
119 LB would like to answer reader’s queries, learn by teaching. LB remembers Hynes’ debt. Canvasser at work.
120. Printing machinery clanks, throbs. Paper uses? Wrap up meat. LB describes ad concept, will need design from Kilkenny paper.
121. Cemetery symmetry. JHM brought to mind. Phiz = face. Almost human machine sllts, door creaks, everything speaks in its own way.
122 PD backwards print, reading backwards, Jerusalem, house of bondage. Life: everybody eating everyone else. Could go home just to see? No.
123. Ned Lambert, Prof. MacHugh & Simon Dedalus at Evening Telegraph office. M murmurs biscuitfully. Mocking windy words, nationalism.
124. Sad. J. J. O’Molloy in decline. What’s in the wind? Money worry. Reaping the whirlwind.
125. O’Molloy works with Gabriel Conroy, who dismissed Romantic Nationalism in The Dead. Shite and onions, life is too short.
126. Ned & Simon need a drink. Editor returns, recalls memorable battles.
127. Dental floss twangs – bingbang, bangbang. Bloom makes his phone call. Aeolian (Eolian) Harp: national emblem of Ireland.
128. Files crack, bell whirrs, Bloom exits – to see Keyes at Dillon’s Auction House.
129. The gallant Lenehan has arrived and bumped into Bloom. The editor seems well on, keys jingling.
128. Files crack, bell whirrs, Bloom exits – to see Keyes at Dillon’s Auction House.
127. Dental floss twangs – bingbang, bangbang. Bloom makes his phone call. Aeolian (Eolian) Harp: national emblem of Ireland.
126. Ned & Simon need a drink. Editor returns, recalls memorable battles.
125. O’Molloy works with Gabriel Conroy, who dismissed Romantic Nationalism in The Dead. Shite and onions, life is too short.
124. Sad. J. J. O’Molloy in decline. What’s in the wind? Money worry. Reaping the whirlwind.
123. Ned Lambert, Prof. MacHugh & Simon Dedalus at Evening Telegraph office. M murmurs biscuitfully. Mocking windy words, nationalism.
124. Sad. J. J. O’Molloy in decline. What’s in the wind? Money worry. Reaping the whirlwind.
125. O’Molloy works with Gabriel Conroy, who dismissed Romantic Nationalism in The Dead. Shite and onions, life is too short.
126. Ned & Simon need a drink. Editor returns, recalls memorable battles.
127. Dental floss twangs – bingbang, bangbang. Bloom makes his phone call. Aeolian (Eolian) Harp: national emblem of Ireland.
128. Files crack, bell whirrs, Bloom exits – to see Keyes at Dillon’s Auction House.
129. The gallant Lenehan has arrived and bumped into Bloom. The editor seems well on, keys jingling.
130. Calumet: peace pipe: cigarettes passed from O’Molloy to Lenehan & the professor. Thanky vous.
131. We musn’t be led away by words. The Romans never set foot in Ireland? Prophet Pilate’s Roman law condemned Jesus. Here comes Stephen.
132. SD gives Deasy’s letter to editor Crawford. Deasy’s wife spoken of. Brought sin into the world.
133. Professor likens Greeks to Irish – the spirituality and intellect superior to would-be masters, Romans and English. Lord have mercy.
134. Lenehan is gas craic with his riddles – Rows of Cast Steel (sounds like an Atlas Shrugged opera). Crawford accepts Deasy’s letter.
135. MC wants Stephen to write something with a bite – SD is reminded of a bad time in Clongowes. Little schemer.
136. Phoenix Park murders recalled – Skin-the-goat involved. His cabby’s shelter will feature later. Bloom phones, told he can go to hell.
137 MC reliving past glories of murder coverage. Old woman of Prince’s street = Freeman’s Journal. Clever, Very.
138. Whiteside, Butt & O’Hagen were barristers, orators, Home Rule supporters. Rhymes and Reasons: SD echoes Dante’s multicolored words.
139. MC indignant, still proclaiming the Journal’s mighty works. Hamlet referenced. How does the ghost know how he died?
140. Stephen mooed by language. Determined the aftercourse. More oratory recalled. AE = George Russell.
141. Revival of Irish tongue. A push to re-establish the Irish language in 1890s. O’Molloy does a terrible re-enactment of Taylor’s speech.
142. Stephen wants to speak noble words but his words are Augustine’s. O’Molloy mentions Moses.
143. Stephen thinks of Daniel O’Connell, dead before entering the promised land of an Irish free state. Daniel, the tribune, spoke at Tara.
144. Meeting adjourned, they head for a pub. Sack of windy troy – overt Homeric reference. Stephen has much to learn.
145. Stephen has a story of Dear Dirty Dublin: vestal virgins at the top of Nelson’s Pillar with 24 plums. WTF?
146. KMA. Bloom returns with a proposal from Keyes for Crawford, who says Keyes can Kiss his arse. Breathless.. whirl… bellows. More wind.
147. Qualls – Bloom & Dedalus almost together at last. Bloom dissed again. Some column! Nelson’s pillar, you see.
148. Onehandled adulterer may be a mastabatoom reference, if you catch my drift. More of the plums story.
149. Becalmed trams. Parable of the plums, plumping for old man Moses. Is the artist bitterer against others or against himself?
150. Aeolus closes with a bang, or a onehandled tickle. Titillating digits, you see. Funmary to come –

“Lestrygonians” (Tweets by JERRY GRIT)
151. LB wandering, handed religious flyer. Recalls glowing cross they lived by before. Sees SD’s sister. Criticizes church on contraception.
152. Thinks priests r fattys. SD’s sis looks starved. On bridge, sees beer barge, recalls Dodd joke. Tosses flyer 2 gulls. Admires gull wit.
153. Buys cakes 4 gulls. Wonders about swanmeat, why saltwater fish ain’t salty. Sees floating ad. Recalls ad placed @ urinal by clap doc.
154. Worries Blazes will give MB the clap. Thinks about parallax. Admires MBs common wit. Sees bad ad from old job. Recalls boss’ stupidity.
155. Recalls how hard it was 2 get nuns 2 pay. A nun invented barbed wire. Recalls happier days with MB before Rudy died. Walks along curb.
156. LB recalls better times w/MB, the night Rudy conceived. Runs into old flame Mrs Breen. Have small talk. Milly’s like a house on fire!
157. Breen asks about LB’s mourning clothes. Funeral talk. LB asks about husband. Mr Breen is nutz. LB smells food. Breen rummages in purse.
158. Breen describes Mr. B’s nightmare about dark figure & postcard rec’d w/only “U.P.” on it. He’s trying 2 sue. LB thinks about food.
159. Talk of Mina Purefoy’s troubled pregnancy, 3 days in labor. Another nut w/a long name walks by. Reminds Breen 2 get her nutty hubby.
160. LB thinks Alf sent U.P. card as bad joke. Passes Irish Times. Recalls ad placed 2 start sexy letters w/Martha C. LB bought ladys panties
161. LB pities Purefoy, Thinks about breastfeeding pain, that its time 2 invent painless pregnancy, how 2 promote savings. Heads 2 library.
162. LB recalls MBs pregnancy. Sees birds, covets aerial pooping. Sees cops, weak when eating. Poet statue @urinal. No public potty 4 ladys.
163. LB recalls run-in w/cops at antiBrit protest. Thinks Corny an informer, how Brits get youth 2 rat. Admires Sinn Fein’s cell structure.
164. LB thinks of diff’t approaches 2 Irish Home Rule movement, but politics don’t change anything. Rich get richer. LB feels eaten&spewed.
165. Coincidences. Sees lesser bro of famous nationalist Parnell & AE, famous poet & Lizzie Twigg’s boss. AE is vegetarian, which LB mocks.
166. LB recalls unsuccessful vegetar’n attempt. Poetic impulse might b caused by diet. Windowshops 4 glasses. Folks lose stuff. Looks @ sun.
167. Wants 2 visit observatory 2 ask about parallax. But won’t change anything. Thinks of happier times w/MB, then of Boylan & lovers codes.
168. Recalls how life changed after Rudy died, no sex w/MB since. Ogles ladies underthings in shop. Knows he can’t go back. Goes 2 eat.
169. Goes 2 The Burton, filled w/men eating sloppy food. Wonders if he looks as sloppy eating. Place is gross. Wants 2 leave. Men order food
170. More revolting eating. Decides 2 go 2 Davy Byrne’s instead. Thinks of the horror of a communal eating future, would make men monsters
171. LB now thinks vegetarianism may not b bad. Enters Byrne’s clean quiet pub. Flynn’s there. Sees potted meat on shelf, still mad about ad
172. Orders a gorgonzola cheese sandwich. Flynn asks about MB’s concert tour and Boylan. LB plays cool, pays 4 sandwich, puts mustard on
173. Worries Flynn knows, but decides he’s dumb. Flynn praises Boylan’s boxing gambling. Flynn asks 4 horserace tip. Bloom eats, admires bar
174. Horserace talk from Flynn. Chix dig cold noses&beards&dogs. LB likes wine w/sandwich, thinks can go home @ 6 & that we eat odd things.
175. Who 1st thought 2 eat oysters? People who eat tainted food, special food. LBs waiter fantasy. Sees flies doink. Wine is LBs #madeleine.
176. LB recalls doink’g MB on Dublin coast as goats watched. MB fed LB like a momma bird. Not anymore. LB ponders bar, curves, divine butts.
177. LB goes potty. Flynn & Boyle talk about LB, his mourning dress, MB’s a tasty piece. Flynn thinks LB rich b/c he’s a Mason. Bores Boyle.
178. Boyle says LBs decent, not a drunk. Reluctant Flynn agrees but that LB wont sign anything. Enter Leonard, Lyons, Rochford. Order drinks
179. More horserace talk. Lyons still thinks he got a betting tip from LB. LB exits potty, waves, exits pub. Sees dog eat, heads 2 library.
180. LB thinks opera, calculates future earning, silk petticoat gift 4 MB, but not 2day. Asks 2 help young blindman cross street, consents.
181. Helping 2 cross, sensitive 2 not condescend. LB ponders blind life: mistreatment, misunderstanding, how other senses become stronger.
182. Ponders blinds’ sex, dreams, life. Adjusts himself. Recalls NY General Slocum disaster. Sees judge Falkiner, only drinks vintage wine.
183. LB passes Mercer Hospital, recalls Handels Messiah presented as benefit 4 it. SEES BOYLAN. Averts eyes, heart races, checks pockets.

“Scylla and Charybdis” (Tweets by LIZAANNE)
184-We’re back in SD’s head as he talks to librarians, feeling superior. Amid literary jokes, conversation of poets, Paradise Lost & Hamlet.
185-Russell argues art=ideas a la Plato; SD is over-polite then thinks of holy trinity, eastern religions & literature.SD=sacrificial butter
186-J.E. tries to start debate b/w Plato & Aristotle, but no dice. Haines was reading Lovesongs but has gone.Guys think him “penitent thief”
187-Best revives Hamlet discussion & teases French; Hamlet ending foreshadows holocaust? 1st mention of 2x dangers (saxon/yankee; devil/sea)
188-SD prepares to defend position that King Hamlet =Shakespeare; sets scene, invokes muse, conjures images of fathers & sons (Ham & Shakes)
189-Anne Shakespeare guilty queen? Russell says “who cares?” SD holds his tongue b/c owes Russ cash.Typically, SD defends debt w/ philosophy
190-SD makes dreadful puns. Anne=SD’s momvia flashback. JE wonders if Anne was mistake best forgotten;SD says was “portal of discovery”
191-more puns; did Anne’s seduction of Shakes influence all his female characters? SD says it’s so. JE invites Best to party– of mysticism?
192-poets’ gathering; Haines invited.”necessity” defined.Moore & Mulligan=Quixote y Sancho.Cordelia=Dulcinea? SD gives Russ letter 2 publish
193-librarian asks SD if he thinks Anne was unfaithful; he agrees gracefully. Then imagines Shakes’ & his own women.ponders might have beens
194-JE says Shakes’s life is enigma & challenges SD to prove Shakes not Hamlet;SD says how past, present, & future become 1. Best confused
195-“There can be no reconciliation if there has not been a sundering” says SD. rejects Shakes=Bacon; Argues that birth of Marina is upturn.
196-Quaker urges SD to publish theories;SD says Dark Lady is wooed badly b/c Shakes lost confidence after Anne seduced him. SD poisons ears.
197-king’s ghost knows b/c of God; Shakes hides from self behind own creation then becomes ghost. Buck enters & SD goes dark.Trinity=Shakes?
198-Quaker tries to make peace. Buck teases. Actress is playing Hamlet; Wilde’s version of who wrote sonnets; “Of course, it’s all paradox”
199- SD jealous of Buck; Buck mocks SD’s telegram & asks if he drank away the money. Says Aunt will go to SD’s father. Buck keeps the tele
200-SD is blamed for Buck’s pranks; remembers France & meeting Faunman. Bloom enters library looking for newspaper & ad to copy
201-Buck teases Jew, then says LB knows SD’s dad. JE asks for more on Anne; SD talks of Shake’s London lovers. Anne=Penelope under doubt
202-What did Anne do? SD suspects Shakes loved a man at court; Anne took a lover. SD says case is proven by no mention of Anne by Shakes
203-JE repeats old explaination of Anne & Shakes’ will. SD rebuts that Shakes was not poor & deliberately neglected Anne b/c she broke vows
204-Other old wills used as contrast; Buck says Shakes died drunk. SD ignores interruption & says Shakes was tight w/ cash, like Shylock.

D’Oh! The tweets crapped out at page 204! I will get us to 219 by the weekend.

Wandering Rocks 2.0: The Reblooming

Okay, here it is. The plan…

I’m driving the bus. And I’m going to be driving it slowly.

I will read one page a day, starting on page 219 on June 16th. And after I read that page, I will one-tweet a summary.

After that summary, I will–as the mood strikes–tweet a commentary. You will be encouraged…even begged…to respond, retweet, hashtag, whatever.

And eventually, whenever I finish a chapter, I will post a formal blog entry collecting all my whimsy and wisdom. And hopefully, some of yours.

The collaboration we had in the beginning was beautiful, unwieldy, and really fast. I can no longer maintain that level of management, detail or pace given my current busy-ness. (I don’t mean to show off.)

Nonetheless, this has several benefits for you:

  1. You will have ample time to catch up and keep up.
  2. I (and perhaps you) will be able to read other things.
  3. We’ll keep Ulysses at a distance..I like to get absorbed in a book as much as the next shallow escapist, but getting absorbed in Ulysses can make you a little nuts.
  4. We can all get better at the social networking thing.
  5. No more tag team wrestling pics.
  6. Just solo ones.

Unfortunately, at this rate, it means it’ll take almost another year and half to finish this thing. I may pick up the pace as we get further along (especially in “Circe”).

All this will be maintained via the Wandering Rocks Twitter, which can be accessed one of two ways:

What ever way you choose to follow, please do. What you may learn about Ulysses may be minimal, but the entertainment in witnessing my slow unraveling in this longrunning procrastinated personal obsession will be maximal.